Friday, October 17, 2008

Maybe I'll just retire

Just out of habit, I always give myself about 12 hours before I go back and look at a recent post I've made. Glaringly obvious errors always turn up when I've given myself time to detach and then looks again with fresh eyes.

I was gone a few days for work, so not until yesterday did I have a chance to look at the post prior to this one. After finding yet another error, as I always seem to do, I was immediately struck with my tone in the post itself... grumpy. As in Walter Matthau as Mr. Wilson in "Dennis the Menace" grumpy.

I kind of had to laugh because Tuesday morning I boarded a plane to Orlando. That's right, the city where Disneyworld is located. You can only imagine the number of small children on my flight. It served me right, after all of my eye-rolling from Saturday, that luckily I wasn't sitting next to any of them. Each time some bright eyed five-year-old would pass my row, I would hold my breath as they lingered and stared at me (you know the way little kids do, in their curious, unawkward way before they realize it's socially unacceptable) and I would smile and hope through my teeth that they would just keep walking. For the record, all of the kids on my flight were impressively well-behaved and I think there was only one melt-down the entire time.

It got me thinking though, at how very "grandpa like" I have become. Seriously:

1. I prefer people to leave me alone on airplanes. We've established this. Old men and I don't like to be bothered. In fact, one of the only interesting people I've ever met on a flight on a New York to Texas weekend WAS an old man, and we got along swimmingly. The problem is that it's more socially acceptable for a man of 70 than a young lady of 23 to be unsociable and taciturn in public. Double standard.

2. I like scotch. Scotch and water, scotch and soda... it's such a unique taste. I tried it for the first time in St. Malo with my friend CT and it's the perfect, nonsweet drink for me when I just want something to sip.

3. I wear grandfather knits. Cardigans, sweaters, unusual socks; sign me up. Argyle? Even better. Brooks Brothers? You know me too well. You have no idea how very often I'll look up at a restaurant and see a 60+ age man wearing something oh-so-similar to my choice. Blue and white gingham with an orange sweater and jeans? I'm pretty sure I wore that earlier this week.

4. I keep falling asleep with the T.V. on. Okay, we've all done this. It's different when you wake up startled and don't remember where you are immediately, only to see Anderson Cooper on and say "oh yeah" and fall back to sleep.

George Wilson: Why do you ask so many questions?
Dennis: I've only been around for five years, there's a lot of things I don't know yet.
- "Dennis the Menace", 1993,

1 comment:

Carrie said...

Marvelous, simply marvelous. And yes, I know the feeling. Nothing like catching yourself muttering under your breath about the little snots behind you on the airplane...