The Ugly Sweater

I'm starting to wonder if I will be able to make it through a holiday season over the next five years without attending an Ugly Christmas Sweater Party of sorts. I don't mind them, I did discover The Taylor Swift Holiday Collection CD on Friday night at one such party, but they've just exploded over the past few years.

People don't even bother having contests anymore, everyone just wants to wear them over and over again in lieu of choosing multiple holiday outfits.

This picture is of my friends and I, in Dallas last week, having an Ugly Christmas Sweater Tea Party of all things. It was grand. The girls agreed that each of our mothers does not appreciate us asking her to borrow clothing for costume purposes. The same goes with 80's Prom or other related events.

I started thinking of what we will get harassed for in 20 years. Our kids will probably wear Juicy Couture sweats and Uggs and laugh at how ridiculous we looked... though I don't think any one of us will ever escape ridicule, from our children or each other, for wearing Doc Martens, either.

"One arrives at style only with atrocious effort, with fanatical and devoted stubbornness."
-Gustave Flaubert

Fourteen; a List

Today marks the one month countdown to my 24th birthday. In honor of this; a list.

14 things you may or may not know about me:

1. I sneeze as if on cue when I'm trying to get comfortable and fall asleep. Usually twice.

2. If I could wake up to find nothing but snow outside on my birthday every year, I would be the happiest girl in the world.

3. The last time I calculated, the average age of my Top Five* was 37.2.

4. It takes me much longer to print than to write in cursive.

5. I never share my passwords to anything with anyone. Ever. Trust issues?

6. I can't touch my toes. It has something to do with having short hamstring muscles. Contrary to popular belief- I am genetically flawed.

7. I have a thing for guys with red hair. Nothing against blondes or brunettes, I have liked one or two of those in my day. No idea why, but the red has a magnetic quality. I think it's the novelty and eye-catchingness of the color.

8. I love Naked Juice, particularly the Mighty Mango flavor, but the idea of carrying something that says "Naked" on the label in to work makes me squirm.

9. I am particular about keeping my car clean. I take it to my dealership, which is a few streets up from my office, once a week during lunch to have it washed. The crowd waiting for their cars inside is usually me and men who are 65+, retired, reading the paper and watching Fox News or SportsCenter. It's like the greatest, un-bothered hour of my week.

10. I own exactly 20 little black dresses. I could wear a different one every weekday for a month without repeats.

11. I always want writing to be a part of my life in some capacity.

12. I have never been in love.

13. I have to have some sort of lip moisturizer within reach at all times. I get more compliments from wearing Aquaphor than any lip gloss.

14. The tiny fraction of emo within my soul is a fan of black nail polish.

15. I would love to play chess, and the piano, well.

*Top Five is a highly regulated list that several of my friends keep, each has her own, of their favorite male actors and musicians. There is also an honorary Silver Fox distinction for a 40+ man, which is separate from the Five.

"You are unrepeatable. There is a magic about you that is all your own."
-Unknown

Keyword Gems

I use Google Analytics, which tracks different demographics for me about the number of people reading my blog, where they are and how they got to my site.

I don't usually pay attention to the "Keyword" feature, but it caught my eye today, because someone found my site by Googling the following:

"Harry Potter and Chi Omega Fraternity Resemblance"

What?! And also, YES.

I have so many questions for that person. Starting with "can we be friends?"

Then I read the others, which were less exciting, but found that two other people also found their way to me by searching for:

"Reluctant, date"

Thanks for the laugh, Google.

The Breckenridge Fiasco

I'm trying to set a personal record to see just how many times I can listen to All I Want For Christmas Is You, Santa Baby and Baby It's Cold Outside this holiday season.

I love cold weather because I grew up and now live in Texas, where you have just as much of a chance at a 70-degree day in December as you do a 30-degree day.

It's just science.

I have always associated cold weather with Christmas, my birthday and vacation; presents, turning another year older, more presents, visiting New York and going on ski trips. Most of these trips have been with my family, going to Colorado, but one in particular I took with a few of my friends. One being the operative word here.

We went to Breckenridge. It was the end of 2003. There were six of us (all girls, all good friends), three experienced Skiers and three Non-Skiers. They had never been skiing before, period. The Non-Skiers spent the first half of our first day in ski school; learning the ropes with an instructor. We Skiers spent the morning all over the mountain, hopping on and off chair lifts. We all had comparable experience, which is always a bonus when skiing with a group (someone is too fast, you lose them; someone is too slow, they get left behind) and we made it through several runs.

We had agreed to meet up for lunch at the bottom of the mountain, and we listened as the Non-Skiers talked about their morning. All of them spoke with confidence regarding their abilities. As we had done the rest of the day, we gathered our things and hopped on the first chair lift we saw after lunch, this time with the Non-Skiers in tow. We would take it slow- no big deal. I was in the first chair as we arrived at the top with no issues, but the second one with the rest of the girls brought the lift to a halt.

I turned around and saw skis and poles going in all directions; sunglasses askew and bodies half-covered in snow. Not good. That's when we learned that they had not actually gone up a chair lift, but rather one of those T-bar lifts that you hold onto as it drags you up a bunny slope. Definitely not good.

While they dusted themselves off, the Skiers started looking at the map to see where we could take them... Where was a green run? Why wasn't there a green run? How did we not check this? There was no green anywhere... it was blue and black runs the whole way down.

We were trying to figure out what to do with the Non-Skiers when they approached us to ask us what was going on in the midst of our semi-formulated plan. When we told them there wasn't a green run, we could see their eyes get larger and larger. That's when they dropped the bomb that their instructor, who probably spent more time flirting with them than "instructing," actually only took them on half of a green run that morning. Once.

We told them it would be "fine" (what else do you do when you think your friends might plunge down a mountain, to their icy cold deaths?), and each of us Skiers paired up with one of them to help get them down the mountain. I was thankfully with my friend AG, who has always been athletic and who was determined not to let the mountain get the best of her. One painfully long hour later, we finally reached the bottom of the mountain. She collapsed onto the snow, exhausted as we tried to keep a lookout for the other girls but had lost them early on.

Making snow angels got old after a while, and it was getting dark, and we decided to head inside and find our bathing suits. The others dragged in, two by two, the Skiers looking weary from the hours of cheerleading and hopeless encouragement and the Non-Skiers looking defeated but alive. We compared stories while we all soaked in the hot tub and relived the day. Turns out that one pair made it down about 45 minutes after we did, and the other pair had some assistance from Ski Patrol, who rescued another.

The next day they compared battle wounds and all had massive bruises, which were appropriate shades of blue and black. The trip was memorable; we were there over New Year's and kept the skiing segregated into our two groups from that point on. Though our friendships were no worse for wear, I could finally see why skiing has never caught on as a favorite honeymoon activity among couples... there are too many opportunities to kill each other. The altitude, the fatigue, the sharp poles in your hands. I don't know if there is anything more frustrating than being right there, wanting to help someone, and being unable to physically do so.

Needless to say, the trip did not catch on as a tradition. Sunbathing on a beach is apparently more conducive to relaxation.

"Skiing combines outdoor fun with knocking down trees with your face."
-Dave Berry

Off-line

I got back last night from a five day business trip to Florida.

(You're thinking: Work?! Florida in December? Not buying it.)

I knew I was going to be busy though, and since I didn't want to bring both my personal and my work laptops around with me to three cities in five days (logistical airport security nightmare) and I chose to leave my MacBook at home. I packed awesomely by the way, I had no superfluous clothing, shoes or accessories and I didn't lose anything, though I did leave half-drinken 20 oz. Diet Dr Peppers in three different hotel room refridgerators.

No offense to the blogging world, but I much enjoyed my time spent away from the internet. During my trip I had few chances to check my Blackberry, much less my Gmail, and I didn't feel like trying to get a browser signal while drinking a pina colada and watching the sunset Friday night in Ft. Lauderdale. I even wandered onto the golf course that wrapped around the resort for a while. As it got darker I then remembered something about alligators and iguanas roaming free and made the executive decision to roam back to a cabana. Someone later told me that if I'm ever confronted with an alligator, I should run side to side instead of straight. Apparently alligators are fast, but they are not quick when they have to change direction.

Lovely, I'll file that away with hitting a shark on the nose and pretending to be dead during a bear attack.

I found it funny that a man I was working with while in Florida said said to me: "for someone who travels all over the country, you still can't lose that Southern drawl, can you?" I replied, "I guess not- I wouldn't want to though! It's part of my charm." It's true, I can't and I don't want to. Why would I?

I needed the break and a change of scenery. I needed to be off-line for awhile and not stare at a computer or an inbox. It wasn't vacation, but I tried to make it relaxing. I did not even pack a bathing suit, and when I talked to MK earlier, who was in Minnesota for work while I was in Florida, I mentioned it to her. Her response?:

MK: Really? I brought mine. I definitely did a cannonball into the pool of the Marriott in Minnetonka, Minnesota.

And that is why we are friends.

"I'd give all wealth that years have piled,
The slow result of Life's decay,
To be once more a little child
For one bright summer day."
-Lewis Carroll

Well-Kept Secrets, Vol. V

I have established that I am a fan of the daily emails. As many other girls do, I e-subscribe to Daily Candy, which are cleverly written, tailored to my city (Dallas) and take literally 20-30 seconds to read.

I read an article recently on the creators of Thrillist.com, which provides a similar service as Daily Candy, only catering to men. They provide "Thrillist Nation" daily news on Food + Dining, Style, Entertainment, Travel, Bars + Nightlife and Home + Gadgets. They also send weekly emails by city.

I like feeling as though gifts I give people are thoughtful, and I have a strict no-gift cards policy, but I'm as guilty as the next girl of giving my fraternity boy brother* Polo shirts and my avid reader and golfer father** a lame tie or something irrelevant from Brookstone. This has definitely become a new resource for me for gift ideas and randomly great websites:

I like the recommendation they made for the website Forvo, which tells you how to pronounce words in any other language you can think of.

I am not the most savvy of music-listeners, but apparently Blue Tunes can load your iTunes library into its online database, so you can access it anywhere.

Who doesn't love cheap wine? Not me and definitely not you. The Accidental Wine Company looks promising.

I drive everywhere now, but this Walk Score website would be great for anyone who hits the pavement.

It is so much cheaper and more efficient to get these in your inbox (read: "gloriously free") than picking up a random copy of Men's Health or roaming aimlessly around a sporting goods store, and takes care of Boston, Chicago, New York, Los Angeles, Las Vegas, San Francisco and Miami on a regional basis as well.

Maybe the emails just appeal to the same side of me who also watches Entourage. I really love that show for some reason. Either way, I like being informed.

*For my brother's 22nd birthday this year I gave him black bow tie and suspenders for his tux. He had a vest and tie but that was a little too prom circa 2004. The classic James Bond look is much more sexy.
**For my dad's 51st birthday I made reservations at a nice restaurant in Dallas and took him to dinner for a change, and for some quality time.



"Enabling informed laziness since 2005. Get emails that let you read very little, yet know pretty much everything."
-Thrillist

The Ranch, The Game, The Ring and other Thanksgiving Tales, Part II

Over a week ago my friend RM had told me the news that our friend SR's boyfriend would be proposing on her 24th birthday; which was Friday. His parents were planning a surprise engagement party for them afterward, so we all made our Thanksgiving travel plans accordingly.

I arrived at MK and SR's apartment Friday evening under the guise of going to a movie with MK. SR was getting ready to go to dinner with her boyfriend, and so I went into her room to talk to her and ask about her birthday and Thanksgiving and whatnot. Playing it cool is not a game I'm very good at, but I tried my best to just act like "oh this will be a fun birthday date" and tell her she looked great in her new outfit.

Meanwhile MK and I were clearly in no hurry to leave for our "movie"; she was baking a brie (apparently her new favorite thing to do) and mixing Cape Cods for us while still in her robe. SR seemed a little on-edge, so we made her take a shot of Grey Goose from a Waterford crystal shot glass. Very classy. She joked that before her first date with her boyfriend two years prior, her college roommates had made her do the same thing.

TC, the boyfriend, came to pick her up, and I watched for any sign of nervousness but found only a poker face as they left. Side note to say that I've seen a few guys pre-proposal and the usual look is a combination of fear and deer in headlights. I even ran into another friend's boyfriend getting coffee one morning in college, and what I thought was a frazzled, sleepless finals-week expression was actually anxiety over having to ask her father, who walked in right after me, if he could marry her.

Minutes later RM and AV blew in to the apartment with the ring, roses and a photo album that TC had made. We all looked at the ring first, of course, placed it back in the box and into the silverware drawer as per TC's instructions, wrapped the roses in tissue paper instead of plastic (makes them look ten times better) and MK tried to find suitable background music on her iPod. We debated a candle, but MK said that SR would be furious with her for leaving a flame burning in the apartment unattended.

We met up with our other friends, KR and AG, continued drinking at a Mexican food restaurant in Dallas, then drove on to TC's parents house. Not paying very close attention, we ended up knocking on the wrong door first, which was answered by a man who was stunned to find five 23-year-old girls and RM on his doorstep. We apologized and asked where Mr. and Mrs. C's house might be, he told us and we kept walking as he said "you can come back if you want to!" Awesome- apparently all you have to do is start knocking on doors, ladies.

We made it to the right house and did not have to wait long for the happy couple to come bursting through the doors. SR was shocked to see everyone and we got to descend upon her with hugs and pictures. TC's mom had even gotten SR a birthday cake, and we all got to enjoy her birthday and her engagement late into the evening. Our friend AG also recently got engaged, and RM joked that it's going to be like the new movie Bride Wars over the next eight months around here... Kidding!

The two of them are planning weddings one month apart for next summer, in the same hometown with many of the same people. Their personalities and fiances are very different, so I'm sure their weddings will be too.

For the record, this makes wedding number five on the docket for 2009.

Also, a happy 24th birthday to my friend KR as well... who I wrote this for one very short year ago.

"You fathers will understand. You have a little girl. An adorable little girl who looks up to you and adores you in a way you could never have imagined... You worry about her meeting the wrong kind of guy, the kind of guy who only wants one thing, and you know exactly what that one thing is, because it's the same thing you wanted when you were their age. Then, you stop worrying about her meeting the wrong guy, and you worry about her meeting the right guy. That's the greatest fear of all, because then you lose her."
- Steve Martin as George Banks, Father of the Bride